Mad dogs and Englishmen

This weekend I made the most of  being on my own and decided to visit my mother in Windsor. What is it about the sunny weather that turns everyone in this country into short tempered maniacs bordering on the edge of madness? Maybe the sun over stimulates testosterone production and as British men are not accustomed to this surge, rather than spending it drooling over anything in a frock, they seem to feel the need to go into battle mode. Why do engines need to be revved so loudly, wheels made to skid round corners, anyone doing less than 20mph over the speed limit need to be over taken and why oh why do white, flabby winter washed chests need to be bared to the world, only to turn pink in a matter of seconds?

My trip meant I spent a total of 6 hours driving and witnessed plenty of dreadful road use, culminating in a really frightening event on the way home. I was driving along the M25 approaching the Wisely junction, where traffic enters the motorway, when I saw a car parked on the hard shoulder. I was in the second lane and as I got nearer a young bare chested man got out the car and walked to the middle of the inside lane, arms open wide and staring straight into an oncoming lorry. He was shouting at the lorry (not that I could tell what he was saying but I got the distinct feeling that this was the culmunation of a road rage incident). At this point I drove past and could only see the outcome out of my rear view mirror. I don't know whether the man jumped out of the way or the lorry managed to avoid him, but I saw the man clip his shoulder on the lorry but otherwise walk away. This was some relief as I fully expected to see a squashed body on the road and a major pile up behind as the traffic was heavy. I was then stuck with what to do. I couldn't call 999 from my mobile as I don't have a handsfree set. so I drove onto the next turn off, which turned out to be a good 10-15 minutes away. I then couldn't really see anywhere to stop so drove on to the Services. By the time I got there it was too late to do a 999 call and all the Traffic Police were otherwise engaged in directing traffic somewhere so I ended up driving home and reporting it to Kent Police later. No one else had reported the incident and no one had died but it concerned me that someone should get so upset and stressed about something that not only would they endanger themselves but threaten the lives of so many more.

(My mother was pleased to see me by the way!)